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How Sexually Rejecting Your Spouse Affects Your Marriage
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Does your spouse say, “You aren’t fulfilling me sexually.” Or, “If you really loved me, you would want to make love with me.”
If so, you probably have a reason why you are refusing sex. Are you refusing sex because you aren’t interested in doing what they want to do sexually- or you aren’t interested in having it as often as they would like?
Whatever the reason may be if you want to make love, that is your right. And, if you don’t want to make love, that is also your right.
However, if your spouse is truly, sexually unfulfilled, and you refuse to be a vital part of their sex life, your marriage could end. How can we say this?! Dr. Joe Beam earned his PhD studying the correlation between marital satisfaction and sexual satisfaction. There is a world-wide consensus among researchers and therapists that marital satisfaction and sexual satisfaction are strongly connected.
Over time, sexual rejection feels like personal rejection. Your spouse may be wondering: “Am I not good enough?”…“Do you not love me?” This is unfortunate, because at the core, sex is a deeply personal connection with your spouse. It is a loving connection; a longing to be one with someone who also wants to be one with you.
So, what is the best approach? Here are three suggestions:
Analyze when it’s a good thing to reject sexually and when it may NOT be a good thing to do. Consider the physical, emotional, and moral well being of yourself and your spouse.
Communicate with your spouse. Speak from your heart. Listen. Talk about what you FEEL and explain why. Offer alternatives.
Have sensitivity toward the sexual difficulties between you two because of your past, or your spouse’s past. Be supportive.
If you know, or heavily suspect, that sexual issues in your marriage are based out of problems in your relationship, please contact us. We will connect you with the best resource that can help.
Interested in learning more about The Spark Resource by Dr. Joe Beam? Click here: https://sparkyourmarriage.com/
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